In the interpersonal communication class, my students and I are studying the term “communication rule” and rules that apply to most types of relationships.
Mark L. Knapp et al. defines a communication rule as “a followable prescription that indicates what communication behavior (or range of communication behavior) is obligatory, preferred, or prohibited in certain social situations.”
Michael Argyle and Monica Henderson found that in Britain, Italy, Hong Kong and Japan, people said the following rules applied in the context of partners. 1. Respect each other’s privacy. 2. Engage in eye contact while talking. 3. Don’t discuss with others what is said in confidence. 4. Do not criticize one another in public. 5. Repay debts, favors and compliments.
1. An accepted way of communicating that most agree with is:
A. cognoscente.
B. polemical.
C. a communication norm.
D. hubris.
E. cognitive normalcy.
2. This is the term for sequences of actions that are carried out automatically with little thought, for example, “How are you?”
A. canards
B. first downs
C. the Icarus Principle
D. scripts
3. Which one is the best thing to do when you encounter an acquaintance?
A. Say “hi” and the person’s first name, followed by a piece of info that both of you relate to, for example., “Hi, Sam. Some storm last night, huh?”
B. Give a low-key “how you doing?”
C. Wait for the other person to speak first.
D. None of the above
Let’s see how you are doing in this interpersonal communication quiz. No. 1 is C. No. 2 is D. A script of “how are you?” without eye contact and enthusiasm is annoying.
No. 3 — Memorize the Vaughan Principle: When you encounter someone you know, give a quick greeting, followed by the person’s first name (if you two are on a first name basis), and a piece of info that both of you relate to, for example, “Listen to the Ole Miss-Alcorn State game last night?”
4. A conversational rule suggesting that the expansiveness of a greeting (between two people who haven’t seen each other for a while) will gradually subside with each subsequent greeting is called:
A. chary panegyric.
B. hubris.
C. attenuation rule.
D. dyadic loquaciousness.
An overly enthusiastic greeting communicates that the absence hasn’t changed a good relationship. No. 4 is C, Erving Goffman’s attenuation rule. Incidentally, I’m probably the first to put the words “chary” and “panegyric” together.
Editor’s Note: Don Rodney Vaughan, Ph.D., teaches journalism, interpersonal communication and public speaking at East Mississippi Community College and is the pastor of Mt. Vernon Baptist Church in Webster County. Contact him at dvaughan@eastms.edu.
