Although “Leaves of three, let them be” is an imperfect adage (poison oak can have up to five), those who are acutely allergic to poison oak, like me, probably remember it. I have been spraying a plethora of poison oak and poison ivy while clearing land around my wife’s and my home. I want to eradicate every poison oak and poison ivy plant from the premises. Just like poison oak and ivy can attach to beautiful trees, poison oak words, as it were, can find their way into our speech, and I’m not referring just to profanity, but also to needless phrases such as “you know what I mean?”, “you see what I’m saying?”, “ya know?”, “like,”, “and the whole nine yards”, “general consensus”, “I’m not a doctor, but”, not to mention grammatical errors. [1.] This is the name of the juice inside poison oak/ivy: A. Sumac [SUE-mack] B. Urushiol [you-RUSH-ee-ul] C. Toxicodenron Radicans [tox-ic-oh-DEN-run-RAD-uh-cuns] D. Molecular Mayhem [2.] Which two aren’t true? A. Poison oak and poison ivy are not poisonous. B. Goats, cattle and deer will not eat poison oak and poison ivy. C. The juice inside the poison oak and ivy leaves is what causes the rash. D. Before it dies, green is the only color of poison oak and ivy. E. Burning poison oak and poison ivy can be hazardous to human health. Let’s see how you’re doing. No. 1 is B. Lisa Ballard in her article titled “Poison Ivy: Busting 6 Myths to Avoid the Itch” says that Urushiol oil binds to the skin in 20 minutes or less; the average human exposure is around 100 nanograms. No. 2 is B and D. [3.] Which one is a homemade remedy for killing poison oak? A. Position speakers toward the infested area and play heavy metal music at 110 decibels or higher. B. Position speakers toward the infested area and play Conway Twitty’s greatest hits at 110 decibels or higher. C. Sow a modicum of “Triple 13” fertilizer around each plant. D. Mix vinegar and water in a garden sprayer. E. Cover each plant with coffee grounds. [4.] Since poison oak and poison ivy are not actually poisonous, its name is a A. metaphor. B. simile. C. idiom. D. onomatopoeia. E. misnomer. No. 3 is D. First, protect yourself with boots, long shirt and cap. No. 4 is E. Editor's Note: Dr. Don Rodney Vaughan is the pastor of Mt. Vernon Baptist Church near Eupora and is on the faculty of East Mississippi Community College, Golden Triangle Campus. Contact him at dvaughan@eastms.edu.
