The other night I was listening to ‘1A’ on MPR where Gwen White moderated an interesting discussion on friendship, the lack of it and its growing demise. In the day it was reported most folks could say they had 6 or more good friends, today most have a hard time coming up with one (other than their spouse). Men especially, it was reported have the worst of it, due to homophobia, or worry about romantic relationships.
Friendship is such an integral part of our human development and our need for a circle of support to keep our lives from going off the rails. What and with whom do we discuss our most intimate thoughts and feelings? To whom do we trust our treasures and secrets?
To whom can we admit wrong-doing, or the winning of some prize? Where did our friends come from and to whom do we have some accountability? Covid brought some of this dilemma to light, but even before with the invention of TV and subsequent social medias…folks are remaining alone and most not to their enrichment.
O. Henry, a USA author, in The Ransom of Red Chief, lays out what a true friend does for us: “I’ve stood by you without batting an eye in earthquakes, fire and flood—in poker games, dynamite outrages, police raids, train robberies, and cyclones…” Perhaps some of these things are not on your list but this one provides a vast selection.
Friendship…my bestie, my BFF, my go-to under all circumstances, does s/he exist for you?
There are all sorts of friendships I suppose some suit me and some suit you. But true friendship suits us both. Shel Silverstein a US poet says this: “I’ve discovered a way to stay friends forever—there’s really nothing to it. I simply tell you what to do, and you do it!”
Abe Lincoln is said to have pointed out: “A friend is one who has the same enemies as you do.” The Scriptures remind us: “Greater love has no one than to lay down life for a friend.” (Jn 15).
I have a friend I have known since 1960, she and I have been separated by distance many times, but we have almost always been able to keep up and I know if I need anything at all…she’d my go to.
Why? Because we have learned over all these years to trust each other.
This vast subject would be a great discussion in a group you might attend or even with your spouse or kids. Perhaps you have had the experience of Piglet when he was near tears: “I wish Pooh were here. It’s so much more friendly with two.” (A.A. Milne, English writer). Maybe this is the week to celebrate your friends…to prepare for Juneteenth, or Father’s Day or any of the other wonderful summer things?
Is it the day to grill out, phone, or visit? OH! And, if your a woman do come to GIRLFRIEND, we are now meeting again once a month at the library. Next one is July 7 at 10 a.m.
In an anon poem,” Tell me quick before I faint, is we friends, or is we ain’t”
BLESSINGS.
